Now Playing: Pretenders by The Pretenders

Hello, radio fans! You'd better "Stop Your Sobbing," because we're listening to Pretenders here on the Mighty Bull, WBUL, 101.6 FM! (goes off for extended bathroom break while record plays)

One thing you miss from listening to this on CD or MP3: there is a lotta music on each side. Fourteen songs on this whole album, and every one a classic! So don't forget:


Chrissie even mentions Howard the Duck, trapped in a world that he never made. Cool!


from Howard the Duck (1976 series) #1 (Marvel, January 1976); co-plot and script by Steve Gerber; co-plot, pencils, and colors by Frank Brunner; inks by Steve Leialoha; letters by John Costanza
Thank you, Pretenders, for giving us the first of many albums that rock!


Bully is listening to Pretenders (Real, 1980), by The Pretenders

Today in Comics History, July 14: Happy birthday, Gustav Klimt!

Happy birthday (born 1862, so use a lotta candles) to painter Gustav Klimt, champion of Art Nouveau and the Vienna Secession, who gave us such famous works as Pallas Athena, Judith and the Head of Holofernes, The Three Ages of Woman, Portrait of Adele Bloch-Bauer, Schubert at the Piano, Girlfriends (or Two Women Friends), Danaë, and The Kiss, aka The Painting Most Likely to be Displayed in an Art Major's College Dorm Room.


cover of Klimt (Glénat France, 2017), pencils and inks by Marc-Renier, colors by Mathieu Barthélémy

Today in Comics History, November 3, 1976: By today's standards, this would make him the most wholesome and electable candidate

from Howard the Duck (1976 series) #9 (Marvel, February 1977), script by Steve Gerber, pencils by Gene Colan, inks by Steve Leialoha, colors by Michele Wolfman, letters by John Costanza

Today in Comics History, August 11: Happy birthday, Joe Quiñones!

A happy birthday today to comics artist Joe Quiñones (Firefly, Batman '89, Dial H for Hero, America, Howard the Duck, Archie Meets Batman '66 and more)! How cool is Joe? He knows Leah Thompson! What can be even cooler than that?


from Howard the Duck (2016 series) #9 (Marvel, September 2016)
What is cooler than that: he knows Squirrel Girl! (From L-R in the Marvel Comics booth: Joe, Chip Zdarsky, Erica Henderson, Ryan North.)


variant cover of The Unbeatable Squirrel Girl (December 2015 series) #9 (Marvel, May 2016), pencils by Erica Henderson, inks by Chip Zdarsky
Happy birthday, Joe!

Face It Tiger February, Day 19: She may not say the words, but Aunt May knows that reference pose

from Howard the Duck (2015 series) #8 (Marvel, August 2016); script by Chip Zdarsky; pencils, inks, and colors by Joe Quinones; additional inks by Joe Rivera, additional colors by Jordan Gibson; letters by Travis Lanham

Today in Comics History, February 13, 1970: We have a sudden realization that his last name actually wasn't "the Duck"

from Howard the Duck (1979 magazine series) #6 (Marvel, July 1980), script by Bill Mantlo, pencils by Michael Golden, inks by Bill McLeod, letters by Jim Novak

Today in Comics History, November 1, 1976: Pre-Election press conference actually clarifies issues for once

from Howard the Duck (1976 series) #8 (Marvel, January 1977), script by Steve Gerber, with plot assists by David Anthony Kraft and Don McGregor, pencils by Gene Colan, inks by Steve Leialoha, colors by Janice Cohen

366 Days with J. Jonah Jameson, Day 175: Surely there is no context that can help you here

Panels from Spider-Man: Back in Quack one-shot (November 2010), script by Stuart Moore, pencils by Mark Brooks, inks by Walden Wong, colors by Andres Moss, letters by Clayton Cowles

Comics Predict the Next President with 100% Accuracy!

Say, who's going to be the next President of the United States? Let's apply the universal rules of the board game Mystery Date. Could it be a dud...


Panels from Howard the Duck (2016 series) #1 (January 2016), script by Chip Zdarsky, pencils and colors by Joe Quinones, inks by Joe Rivera, letters by Travis Lanham
...or a...well, I'm not gonna call her a dream, sorry:


Panels from Fantastic Four Annual 2001 (September 2001), plot by Carlos and Rafael Marin, script by Jeph Loeb, pencils by Kevin Maguire, inks by Wade Von Grawbadger, colors by Chris Sotomayor, letters by Richard Starkings
Fact is, neither one of these comic books actually goes out of their way to truly say who will be the 45th President of the United States.

Well, except this one:


Panels from Star Trek (Gold Key/Western 1967 series) #9 (February 1971), script by Len Wein, pencils and inks by Alberto Giolitti
There ya go. Surprise third-party candidate Anton York will win the 2016 election. Also: the Doctor Strange movie is going to influence fashion a lot more than you might expect.

So start reading up on our next POTUS today!

366 Days with J. Jonah Jameson, Day 36: Why a duck?

Panels from Howard the Duck #1 (January 1976), script by Steve Gerber, pencils by Frank Brunner, inks by Steve Leialoha, colors by Frank Brunner, letters by John Costanza

Teniversary Countdown #24: And away goes Spidey, down the drain

Continuing the exciting countdown to my tenth anniversary of blogging by posting panels from comic books' tenth issues!


Panel from Howard the Duck (1976 series) #10 (March 1977), script by Steve Gerber, pencils by Gene Colan, inks by Steve Leialoha, colors by Janice Cohen, letters by Jim Novak

The Marvel Comic Where the Jerk Wins in the End

...no, no, not Civil War #7...


Cover of Civil War #7 (January 2007), pencils by Steve McNiven, inks by Dexter Vines, colors by Morry Hollowell
...but rather, My Love #10!


Cover of My Love v.2 #10 (March 1971), pencils by John Buscema, inks by John Verpoorten, letters by Sam Rosen
Yes, My Love! The only Marvel comic book named after a Sir Paul McCartney song. (At least until Magneto/Titanium Man Team-Up came out.)


Our scene opens in a fancy restaurant, where Our Heroine™ Gwen Stacy Beverly Dayton is out on a date with her jerky boyfriend "Flash" Thompson Nick Howard, waited on my Professor Charles Xavier a waiter. This story is, as the credits tell us, "narrated to Stan Lee," which is pretty much the way the rest of the Marvel Universe books were written, if I recall correctly. Remember when Stan 'n' Jack would head on over to the Baxter Building to get the low-down on what had happened in the past month to the Fantastic Four? And how the FF would toss them out because they'd betrayed the FF to Doctor Doom in Fantastic Four #10? Oh, how they all laughed and laughed.


Nick is, not unlike Doctor Doom, a jackass himself:


Now, I don't want to contradict our heroine, but I was pretty certain that in Marvel Comics, girls named Beverly loved duck:

Panel from Howard the Duck Annual #1 (May 1977), script by Steve Gerber, pencils and inks by Val Mayerik, colors by Janice Cohen, letters by Joe Rosen
It's pretty obvious that Nick doesn't give a dang 'bout the opinions and wants of Beverly, dragging her off to all the places she'd rather not go on a date: the fights, a nightclub, a Star Trek convention... I bet that prize fight would have been a lot more interesting if it had been Muhammad Ali versus Superman, but alas, that was not to happen for another seven years.


Because it is the 1970s, it is federally mandated that Beverly discover Women's Liberation! Probably around the same time she discovered est, the Ford Pinto, the typeface Helvetica, the television series All in the Family, and many other events that occurred in 1971. It was a tumultuous age, after all!


Hooray! At last, Bev asserts her own identity and say so long and see you later...not! to that loser Neanderthal Nick. Also, she bought some groovy pop art and a "5" sign for her wall. Who says this isn't the age of far-out flourishment?


The story woulda been lovely and had a very happy ending...if it had just stopped there. "I am woman, hear me roar!" should declare Beverly! Instead, the Divine Ms. D. attempts a disappointing string of romantic dates with wishy-washy modern men. How rude! They actually give her a chance to voice her opini9on. Well, that's no good, either.


As the old folk song goes, "nice guys finish last," and they also have an entire Wikipedia page devoted to them. What the Sam Scratch, Wikipedia? Must you have a page for everything? Geez! (This is okay, though.)


In a panel that could have been ripped off by Roy Lichtenstein if only he'd been reading My Love, Beverly "realizes" that Womens' Lib only applies to her right to be paid the same as men for doing the same work. She then immediately returned to her career as Secretary of State under Richard M. Nixon, earning a peachy $7,800 a year.


So, by the end of the story, she's back in the arms of he-man woman-hater Nick. Boo! Boo! "The Start of Something Lovely!" declares the caption. More like "Three Years Later, the Divorce!" Hah! (Also, once again I ask...where do you find a green suit?!?)


Poor, poor Beverly, saddled with a jerk thug for a boyfriend and misguided ideas of what Women's Lib is all about. Somebody send her a copy of Betty Friedan's The Feminine Mystique or is a nonfiction book by Mary Wollstonecraft's A Vindication of the Rights of Woman or at least Ms. Marvel #1.

We started this post with Paul McCartney's "My Love," but it's too bad, for Bev's sake, that it would be another 12 years until Sheena Easton sang

He asks her to dinner, she says I'm not free
Tonight I'm going to stay at home and watch my TV

I don't build my world 'round no single man
But I'm gettin' by, doin' what I can
I am free to be, what I want to be
'N all what I want to be, is a modern girl

Yeah! You tell it, Sheena, sister!

Na na na na na, na na na na na, na na na na na, she's a modern girl
Na na na na na, na na na na na, na na na na na, she's a modern girl

More Cow/Bull Month, Day 23: Man, that is one giant chicken.

Panel portion from Howard the Duck [Magazine] #1 (October 1979), script by Bill Mantlo, pencils by Michael Golden, inks by Klaus Janson, letters by Joe Rosen

Hellcow Week, Day 2: Can you steak my heart?

Panels from Giant-Size Man-Thing* #5 (August 1975), script by Steve Gerber, pencils by Frank Brunner, inks by Tom Palmer, colors by Glynis Wein, letters by Annette Kawecki


*giggle giggle

Hellcow Week, Day 1: If I was your vampire, certain as the moo

The Mid-Day Matinee this week, all week: Hellcow! If DC's favorite animal is monkeys, then the Marvel Universe loves cows! Bova, the nanny of Quicksilver and the Scarlet Witch! (Ah, so she's to blame for how they turned out!) Those Skrulls that were turned into cows! And.....and....okay, and some other cows! But my favorite cow of the Marvel Universe has only made appearances in two stories (the last one only last year). Even so, I predict fame and a movie deal in her future! Prepare to meat meet Bessie...Hellcow!



Panels from Giant-Size Man-Thing* #5 (August 1975), script by Steve Gerber, pencils by Frank Brunner, inks by Tom Palmer, colors by Glynis Wein, letters by Annette Kawecki


*tee hee

The Genial Giant

Howard the Duck meets KISS on the final page of Howard the Duck #12 (May 1977), script by Steve Gerber,
pencils by Gene Colan, inks by Steve Leialoha, colors by Janice Cohen, letters by Jim Novak

Gene Colan
1926-2011
Rest in Peace

Man-Thing! You make my heart sing!

You kids today complaining that your Seven Soldiers or your Final Crisis or your Batman R.I.P. is too confusing and difficult to read...pfui. Why, in the good old days, we took the mind-boggling confusion that comic books dishes up for us and gobbled it up with butter and jam. Grant Morrison? Sure, he can write a comic book that throws in metacommentary, nanotechnology, fifties Batman stories and Jezebel Jade, but he's a mere piker compared to the master of gonzo superhero comics, the late great Steve Gerber, who tosses in everything including the kitchen sink...and a revolver-firing duck to boot. Don't believe me? Read and learn, o clueless ones!

Imagine this: The year is 1973, and NASA launches the last of America's deep-space probes. In a freak mishap Ranger 3 and its pilot, Captain William 'Buck' Rogers...oh wait, I've gotten mixed up again. The year is 1973, and on your local drugstore's comic rack you can find the premiere issue of one of Marvel's most unusual comic books: Man-Thing, who was aptly known as the "muck-crusted mockery of a man," even long before Michael Jackson tried to lay claim to that title. Hey! It says #1 on the front, so it must be the beginning of a brand new saga and storyline. Plunk down your 20 cents on the counter of Mister Gower's drugstore and run back home to the treehouse to peel open the fantastic Frank Brunner front cover, and prepare yourself...wait, no, you simply cannot prepare yourself...for the weirdness within:


All panels from Man-Thing #1 (January 1974), written by...oh, just look at the credits above, okay?

What...wha...huh? What the Sam Scratch is goin' on here? Maybe we've come in on the middle of issue two or three...



Nope. That's issue number one, all right! To be fair, this is continued on from Manny's feature in Adventure into Fear #19, but still, hoo-whee! That's one user-unfriendly first issue. Oh well, it oughta be easy to pick up as we go along...I mean, it's not like Gerber's gonna get too crazy in ish one, is he? Is he?

Okay, on page two we got a proto-He-Man and Howard the Duck springing into action...



Huh. Altho' it wouldn't premiere for more than another year, here's barbarian Korrek doing his Monty Python and the Holy Grail impersonation. It's only a flesh wound!



Well, that oughta be enough violence for everyone...until Howard the Duck starts firing a revolver!



I think, deep within each one of us, we've all heard a duck crying out "Why aren't you dead?"



Okay, if that's not enough, set the scene for an omniversal gathering of beings from across every reality. Yes, years before Chris Claremont got into the elderberry wine and was creating multiple Excaliburs (Excalibii?) getting together to have a lovely Sunday roast and watch the snooker on the telly, Steve Gerber brought together a host of warriors under the omniscient all-high-and-mighty Sylvania light bulb. Hey, wait on the female sacrifice until after the port and cigars, cavemen and cavaliers and Vikings and beekeepers!



Everybody who's anybody is there to greet the coming of the Overmaster. Not to be confused with the Ovenmaster (GE's new radial range for '74!), the Overmaster is jockeying to take control of all realities by murdering teenage bikinied Jennifer Kale, who is (I kid you not) Ghost Rider's cousin. Which Ghost Rider? Both of them. Lucky that flaming skulls don't seem to run in that branch of the family, I guess. In the meantime, the Overmaster is heralded on stage by a Twi'lek dancing girl. Well, beats workin' for Jabba, I guess:



Suddenly, for no apparent reason: Daredevil and Black Widow!



And...they're gone again. Let's give 'em a big hand, everyone...Daredevil and the Black Widow! (Yayyyyyyyy!)

Okay, obligatory Matt Murdock cameo out of the way. Turn the book sideways now as Steve-O gets everybody on stage for the big Cossack number:


Click picture to embiggen

Wow. Superheroes, knights, centaurs, dinosaurs, battle wagons, war elephants, fighter planes, shock troopers, and apparently John F. Kennedy's Dallas motorcade to the rescue. Oh, and hey, look, there's Man-Thing, too! I was wondering what happened to him.

How do you wrap a plot like this up? Well, Steve Gerber takes a page from Mission: Impossible and shows us that yes, even satanic demons wear rubber masks to disguise their features:




Then there's a mystical fight or something between Dumbledore and Voldemort. When the dust has settled, the Balance of the Force is restored and the Genesis Planet is no more. Oh, yes, the true gods of all reality are revealed...to be dogs:



So, there ya go, huh? Man-Thing #1. One. Freaky. Mamajama. Of a comic book. But, you know, I bet things will calm down by issue #2...there's not bound to be any exceptional weirdness in the second ish, is there?



...well, except for an alligator getting beaned with a cup of coffee.

Steve Gerber. Ya gotta love him. The comics world is all the poorer without his way-out wacky worlds.