Happy Election Day, everyone! I hope you'll all have time to read this so you can get back to the couch and be sure not to miss the annual viewing of
You're Not Elected, Charlie Brown and
Rudolph's Hanging Chad Adventure followed by the all-new
Faith Hill Family Election Night Musical Special! Boy, I can
not wait until that spinny thing comes out and says it's a CBS special presentation!
Say, trivia buffs...do you know what long-running CBS TV program that "CBS Special Presentation" music is taken from? (No, no, it's not
Kate and Ally.)
Here's the answer! (Be sure to click on the "play all samples" button to hear the genesis of that thrilling holiday special track!)

But back to election day. As
Batman reminded you yesterday, the American political structure is based on the common citizen's ability to see past the glitz and glamor of contemporary politics to examine the
real issues at hand. Like pollution. Urban crime. And all those parking tickets the Batmobile gets when Batman and Robin leave it in front of Gotham City's police headquarters.
That still and speech were taken from a
Batman '66 episode, "Hizzoner the Penguin," in which that
foul fowl featured fiend, Oswald Cobblepot,
The Penguin, ran for (and almost won) mayorship of Gotham City, USA! Holy rigged elections, Batman! So inspiring was this concept that Tim Burton later made it a plotline in his blockbuster 1992 motion picture
Batman Returns, a movie especially noticed for its creation of a Catwoman who can come back from the dead and still can't hide seams in her costume and the line "You know, mistletoe can be deadly if you eat it. "
Good advice by Batman, folks! But it's not until the comic book series
Batman Adventures (v.2, 2003) that the idea becomes a reality: Penguin really does get elected to become Gotham's Mayor! Aieeee! That's pretty dire! I mean, I can't think of a single
worse person to become mayor...
Hmmm, okay. Point taken.
The Mayor Cobblepot subplot actually spans nearly the entire length of the series, running from #1 to 13 (the series ended with issue #17). It's some remarkable worldbuilding and fascinating storytelling that influences Batman and Company's adventures all the way down the line, to the point where Batman actually must enlist a deadly (if temporarily reformed) enemy to help him bring down the Penguin:
Panels from Batman Adventures v.2 #11 (April 2004), script by Ty Templeton, pencils by Rick Burchett, inks by Terry Beatty, colors by Lee Loughridge, letters by Rob Leigh
Ahem. Please excuse a momentary aside while I remind my good pals at DC Comics that most of the excellent tie-in comics to the animated Batman, Superman, and Justice League TV series have never been in trade paperback format, and those that were are now long out of print. So, DC, how about making some nice colorful all-ages trade compilations of (inhale) Batman Adventures (volumes 1 and 2), Batman and Robin Adventures, Batman: Gotham Adventures, Batman Adventures: The Lost Years, the Batgirl Adventures special, Superman Adventures, Justice League Adventures, Justice League Unlimited and one of the great near-forgotten gems of those animated universe days, Adventures in the DC Universe? After all, out of 52 Earths, surely one of them has to be the Timmverse, right? And how about considering a Wonder Woman comic in the same style for young readers who love the WW? Please and thank you, DC!
Batman Adventures v.2 #13 begins the wrap-up of the evolving storyline with members of the #occupygotham movement inhabiting Mayor Cobblepot's front lawn. Hey, they've got torches! Way cool. When a torch-bearing mob of protestors face off against armed police in riot gear, that's going to be completely safe and uneventful, right?

Panels from Batman Adventures v.2 #13 (June 2004), script by Ty Templeton, pencils by Rick Burchett, inks by Terry Beatty, colors by Heroic Age, letters by Ken Lopez
As befits his namesake bird, denizens of the Antarctic who eat herring and poop in an explosive wide blast area around themselves, Mayor Cobblepot cooly and calmly addresses his constituency with political restraint and tact:
But of course Batman (
because he is Batman) figgers out the truth at last:
voting machine tampering resulted in Cobblepot's election to higher office. Thank goodness the Riddler's new trademark ?Phone helped the Dark Knight unravel the mystery! How do you like
those Apples, Steve Jobs? (Whoops. Tasteless. I'm sorry.)
how do you like those apples, giggle!
Shed a tear for the defeated Penguin, a bird without a roost, a fowl without an egg, a Hizzoner without honor...
Well, that was certainly one of the most gracious resignations from high office ever, huh? You've got to flipper it to the Penguin, he certainly took his dethroning with grace and good-humored acceptance...
So, on this magic enchanted holiday night, let us remember the
true meaning of Election Day, and vow to honor and keep its spirit in all its ways. The Penguin had no further involvement with elections, but lived upon the Total Kill Batman Principle, ever afterwards; and it was always said of him, that he knew how to keep Election Day well, if any man alive possessed the knowledge. May that be truly said of us, and all of us! And so, as Damian Wayne observed,
"Tt."
Anyway, rigging elections by tampering with the voting machines? It's just a comic book. That would
never happen in
real life.
*Oh, I'm not proud of that pun at all.**
**Yes I am.