Wednesday, April 01, 2020

Life Under Quarantine: Chalk Talk





Today One Thousand Years in the Future in Comics, April 1, 2993: That one never goes out of style


from Legion of Super-Heroes (1989 series) #41 (DC, March 1993), script by Tom Bierbaum and Mary Bierbaum, pencils by Chris Sprouse, inks by Karl Story, colors by Tom McCraw, letters by John Workman

The 1992 2020 Marvel Age Calendar: In April I will just stay set / And smoke a Winston cigarette

Alas! Instead of the usual monthly 1992 calendar that we can use again in this shelter-at-home era of 2020, Marvel Age #112 instead provided us with this kinda-silly house ad:


Granted, this issue does give us the bovine excellence of Mark Texeira's TexCow:


But that doesn't solve the problem of needing an April 1992 calendar you can use to count of the many, many days we're all stayin' indoors. Tell ya what: here's the Winston Cigarettes Page-a-Day calendar for April 1992.


So smoke 'em if you got 'em tear off the pages every day to keep track of the rich, delicious taste and cool menthol that only aa Winston can give you each day you don't go out without gloves and a mask and unless you really need to, okay? Remember: it tastes good like a calendar should!

PS: Don't smoke, kids. I'm dead now. Don't smoke.

PPS: I'm not dead.

Also not dead: The X-Men's Kitty Pryde, because the very first time she tried smoking...


Panel from Uncanny X-Men #186 (August 1985), script by Chris Claremont, breakdowns by John Romita, Jr., finishes by Dan Green, colors by Glynis Oliver, letters by Tom Orzechowski

...and Ms. Pryde never smoked ever again.


Panels from Generation Next #2 (April 1995), script by Scott Lobdell, pencils by Chris Bachalo, inks by Mark Buckingham, colors by Steve Buccellato, letters by Richard Starkings

OH FOR CRYING OUT LOUD KITTY


Tuesday, March 31, 2020

Today in Comics History, March 31: Ben Grimm Goes to DashCon

Hey hey hey Baxter Building Boosters! What day is it?

Today the Human Torch plays a April Fool's joke on the Thing, in one of the finest Ben Grimm stories put down on paper! (Seriously, you need to get it. It's in Marvel Fanfare #15, and I don't know why it hasn't been reprinted twenty times. Ask for it by name!


from Marvel Fanfare #15 (Marvel, July 1984); script, pencils, inks, and colors by Barry Windsor-Smith; letters by Jim Novak

But wait, Bully! (you're saying) Why are you posting this a day too early? Have you made a mistake? (you ask). Well, no (I say). I'm not the one who made a mistake.


In any case, get a good night's sleep, and have a peaceful and serene April Fool's Day tomorrow. Don't do anything too extreme: I don't think our hearts can stand it this year.


Monday, March 30, 2020

Today in Comics History, March 30, 1981: Big Blue meets...well, don't look directly at it.


from Doomsday Clock #10 (DC, July 2019), script by Geoff Johns, pencils and inks by Gary Frank, colors by Brad Anderson, letters by Rob Leigh