Archie's Generic Celebrities Month, Day 8: Not Actually Judy Garland

Panel from "Theme Dream" in Archie Double Digest #230 (August 2012), script by George Gladir, pencils and inks by Rex Lindsey

Today in Comics History, November 8, 1933: Invention of Tide to Go Instant Stain Remover makes comics safer for Comics Code Authority

from Savage Wolverine #17 (Marvel, April 2014); script, pencils, inks, and colors by Richard Isanove; letters by Cory Petit

Today in Comics History, November 7, 1972: Marvel publishes first issue of John Shaft and His Jive Turkey Friends

from Mighty Avengers (2013 series) #11 (Marvel, August 2014), script by Al Ewing, pencils by Greg Land, inks by Jay Leisten, colors by Frank D'Armata, letters by Cory Petit

Archie's Generic Celebrities Month, Day 7: Not Actually the Go-Go's

Josie in "Group Gripe" from Archie at Riverdale High #91 (May 1983), writer and artist unknown (Dan DeCarlo art?)
And now, a special bonus: Not Actually Absolutely The Go-Go's!:


Josie in "Limelight Lament" from Archie (1959 series) #329 (May 1984), writer and artist unknown
What do the Go-Go's got that the Pussycats do not?

THEY HAVE BULLY THE LITTLE STUFFED BULL.

Archie's Generic Celebrities Month, Day 6: Not Actually Jason Voorhees

Panels from "The Scream Team" in Archie (1959 series) #465 (November 1997), script by George Gladir, pencils by Stan Goldberg, inks by Henry Scarpelli, colors by Barry Grossman, letters by Bill Yoshida

Today in Comics History, November 5: England provides the twenty-first century with a role model, a guy who planned to blow up a government building, but who protest groups today apparently think is really cool because of those plastic masks

from Detective Comics #590 (DC, September 1988), script by John Wagner and Alan Grant, pencils and inks by Norm Breyfogle, colors by Adrienne Roy, letters by Todd Klein

Today in Comics History, November 5: Batman is hung by the chimney with care

from Detective Comics #593 (DC, December 1988), script by Alan Grant, pencils by Norm Breyfogle, inks by Steve Mitchell, colors by Adrienne Roy, letters by Todd Klein

At 13th Dimension: Spider-Man's Screwiest Spider-Verses: Teens vs. Ultron!

Tonight, my pal John has a new post up over at comics news 'n' culture blog 13th Dimension, an' I helped! Continuing John's sure-to-be-Eisner-nominated series on weird and oddball alternate Spider-Man Universes, he's told us all about the time Spider-Man contributed to engineering education for teens and he fought the rampaging Doctor Octopus and Ultron. Well, sorta. In the end it's actually the civilians who save Spidey's bacon (and that's even without him being Spider-Ham!) You can pretty much count on Spider-Man just passing the buck in his adventures, can't you?:


Panels from The Amazing Spider-Man NACME Series: Riot at Robotworld #2 (1991), script by Dwayne McDuffie, pencils by Alex Saviuk, inks by Chris Ivy, colors by Paul Becton, letters by Jon Babcock
Ah, that's the Spider-Man we know and love.

Also, as Spider-Marshall-McLuhan would remind us, this is a comic book brought you to by the fine folks at the major corporations who contribute to the National Action Council for Minorities in Engineering, and so they get to have their names listed in a Spider-Man comic book. Be certain to buy stuff from them all! (Hey, it's just like Kickstarter!)


So check out SPIDEY’S SCREWIEST SPIDER-VERSES #3: Teenagers vs. Ultron over at 13th Dimension, the comics site that's ten dimensions better than reality!

In conclusion: engineering jobs for minority kids: good. Ultron: bad.

Archie's Generic Celebrities Month, Day 5: Not Actually Hootie and the Blowfish

Panels from "Hearing Aided" in Betty and Veronica (1987 series) #106 (December 1996), script by Mike Pellowski, pencils and inks by Dan DeCarlo, colors by Barry Grossman, letters by Bill Yoshida

Today in Comics History, November 4: Batman and Katana diplomatically refrain from mentioning Alfred's enormous chin

from Beware the Batman #1 (DC, December 2013), script by Ivan Cohen, pencils and inks by Luciano Vecchio, colors by Franco Riesco, letters by Wes Abbott

Previews for Bulls (November 5, 2014)

In which a little stuffed bull looks at the comic shelves from the bottom up ('coz I'm very, very small) and tells you about comics, books, merch and dust-gatherers on sales tomorrow, Wednesday, November 5. So before you heads off to blow up Parliament just because you have a cool mask that came with your V for Vendetta trade, go buy some fine comics! Or maybe some of these.


GRAYSON #4

Here's a random thought: why is Dick Grayson called Agent #37 in this series...and not Agent #38?

Also, whoa, is that the most psychedelic and vertigo-inducing comic book cover you'll see this week?...




GREEN LANTERN #36

...OH WELL PLAYED DC.

Today in Comics History, November 4, 1990: First appearance of Booster Gold on the front page of a newspaper not accompanied by the world "alleged"

from Justice League Quarterly #1 (DC, Winter 1990), plot and layouts by Keith Giffen, script by J.M. DeMatteis, pencils by Chris Sprouse, inks by Bruce Patterson, colors by Gene D'Angelo, letters by Bob Pinaha

Archie's Generic Celebrities Month, Day 4: Not Actually Guy Fieri, Rachael Ray, or Paula Deen

Say, who's this hash-crashing the Riverdale High cafeteria, domain of dinner doyenne Bernice Beazly? Why, it's some Gourmand Generic Celebrities!


Splash page from "Cafeteria Cook Showdown" in World of Archie Double Digest #7 (July 2011), script by Bill Golliher, pencils by Stand Goldebrg, inks by Al Milgron, colors by Barry Grossman, letters by Janice Chiang
Let's introduce them by their generic parody names, shall we? Oh dear oh dear oh dear.


Guy and Rachael Dude and Maple are introduced as pretty darn cool, and so would you if you had a multi-million dollar advertising cookware campaign running in major magazines around the world, including inside the Archie Universe. But right from the start "Deanna Paul" is shown to be harboring a dark, dark secret from her Southern past. Could it be that she's fond of using... gasp!... the "N" word? Why yes, here in Riverdale, Deanna can't resist referring to... Nabisco!


Suddenly...national television channel reality program showdown! What, you're doing a TV show about cafeteria food without Oliver Jameson?


Of course, Ms. Beasly's infamous un-food pulls swiftly to the lead, thanks to Dude Ferrari's palate for food from (in the name of his popular TV series) Dumpsters, Debris and Dung!


Turns out Deanna Paul's secret shame is that she flunked out of cafeteria school. Also, that her name used to be "Mary Slimapple." Also, that she smokes twenty packs of butter daily.


HA HA HA HA Deanna Paul opens her own mouth and inserts foot. Well, it oughta be better than those Lard Squyares she's been hawking.
THUS PERISH ALL ENEMIES TO MS. BEAZLY.

Today in Comics History, November 3: The only man who never escaped from Blackgate Prison is kicked out

from Detective Comics #777 (DC, February 2003), script by Ed Brubaker, pencils by Tommy Castillo, inks by Wade von Grawbadger, colors by Jason Wright, color separations by Wildstorm FX, letters by Todd Klein

Archie's Generic Celebrities Month, Day 3: Not Actually The Rolling Stones

Panel from "Backstage Pass" in Betty and Veronica (1987 series) #232 (February 2008), script by Mike Pellowski, pencils by Jeff Shultz, inks by Al Milgrom, colors by Barry Grossman, letters by Jack Morelli
And yes, the lead singer of the Tumbling Boulders is named Nick Swagger.

Ten of a Kind: Happy Birthday, Steve Ditko!

(More Ten of a Kind here.)

Archie's Generic Celebrities Month, Day 2: Not Actually Ashlee Simpson

Panels from "Red Carpet Romance" in World of Archie Double Digest #27 (May 2013), script and pencils by Fernando Ruiz, inks and letters by Jon D'Agostino (credited)

Today in Comics History, November 2, 1990: Today's surprise headline. Turns out he's really a girl!

from Superman: Secret Identity #1 (DC, January 2004), script by Kurt Busiek; pencils, inks, and colors by Stuart Immonen; letters by Todd Klein

Today in Comics History, November 2, 1943: Starfleet regrets letting Jim Kirk borrow the Enterprise to rescue Spock

from "Philadelphia Experiment" in Atomic Robo Presents Real Science Adventures #6 (Red 5, September 2012), script by Brian Clevinger, pencils and inks by Erica Henderson, letters by Jeff Powell