Thursday, January 02, 2020

Today in Comics History, January 2, 1988: Superhero team The Uncanny Car-Exploders makes their debut

from Psi-Force #19 (Marvel/New Universe, May 1988), script by Fabian Nicieza, pencils by Ron Lim, inks by Tony DeZuniga, colors by Greg Wright, letters by Rick Parker

Today in Comics History, January 2, 2019: Lois Lane forced to write promo puff piece for terrible miniseries

from Heroes in Crisis #4 (DC, March 2019), script by Tom King, pencils and inks by Clay Mann, colors by Tomeu Morey, letters by Clayton Cowles

Wednesday, January 01, 2020

The year is 2020 / And in the club, Love4OneAnother*

Say, practiced pop culture professionals, what's the common factor between

Cover of COPS #1 (August 1988), pencils by Pat Broderick, inks by Dennis Janke





No? Any takers? You, the guy in the third row? No? Well, here's another clue for you all:

YES FOR PETE'S SAKE PEOPLE, especially you the guy in the third row: these all take place in the Year 2020! And, coincidentally enough, so do we!

2020! As I hinted earlier today, it's not only a good lens prescription, it's also a futuristic year of excitement, adventure, and most of all, contentment and world peace! I'm sure you walked down the streets today and experience this kind of Utopia:

Panels from Iron Man 2020 one-shot (June 1994); co-plot and script by Walt Simonson; co-plot, pencils, and inks by Bob Wiacek; colors by Christie Scheele; letters by John Costanza

Mind you, finding pop culture references to 2020 is hard. Why, nothing even happens this year in Star Trek! I'm certain you remember a couple years ago when they made sleeper ships obsolete, but we are certainly not on our way to a world where there are republican terrorists and the US government will throw thousands of homeless and indigent persons into inhumane internment camps. That's just crazy science fiction talk!

But I'm sure you have recognized our own year in comic books, which give us the up-to-date lingo we now currently speak and the products we use daily!

Panels from Machine Man (1984 miniseries) #1 (October 1984); script by Tom DeFalco; breakdowns by Herb Trimpe; finishes, inks, and colors by Barry Windsor-Smith; letters by Michael Higgins

Yes, I know what you're thinking...Why don't they build the entire plane out of the black box Are we going to see an appearance by the World's Greatest Hero of the Future Today, the costumed character that embodies the true spirit of 2020? And I say thee...YEA!

Page from Machine Man #2 (November 1984); script by Tom DeFalco; breakdowns by Herb Trimpe; finishes, inks, and colors by Barry Windsor-Smith; letters by Diana Albers

No! (Sorry, fans of guys named "Arno.") We're gonna look at this futuristic pulled-from-today's-headlines dude!:

Inset on the cover of Superman (1939 series) #354 (December 1980), pencils by Ross Andru, inks by Dick Giordano

Yes, Superman 2020! Faster than a speeding laser blast! More powerful than a Tesla underground electric car! Able to leap tall geodesic domes at a single bound! It's a SpaceX! It's a drone! He's the hero of all the cognoscenti / His name again is Superman 2020!

So, tune into the next installment so we can cast an (unusually green-tinged but I'm certain it'll be okay) spotlight on Supes '20. Who says this isn't the Mighty Bully Age of a big build-up to something I promise for tomorrow?

Oh, and if you're looking for

...we'll all meet here in one year.

*Play us off, Prince of 1999 2020!

Bully Doesn't Eat Food: Brussels Sprouts

We went to the grocery store today and I made this astonishing and exciting discovery of a brand-new product for 2020!

This is such a great idea and very handy! It saves so much work. You cook 'em in the bag — and then you can just throw the whole bag of sprouts out into the garbage. No mess!

Added note on January 1, 2021: Oh yeah. Now that was a foreboding portent about how 2020 was gonna turn out, wasn't it? Sigh.

The 1992 2020 Marvel Age Calendar: In January it's so nice / To put Rick Jones on ice

Hello 2020! What d'you have to say about the new year, Cap?

Man, I worry about Captain America these days.

Yes, that's the kind humor you can enjoy all month long with the

"The 1992 Marvel Age Calendar: January" from Marvel Age #109 (February 1992);
by Mike Lackey and Darren Auck
(Click picture to Reaper Madness-size)

The joke all of January is that Rick Jones is dead and pretty much nobody cares! Haw! Wow, good thing that's not happening in Marvel Comics here in 2020, right? (tugs collar, makes choking sound, looks around nervously)

Mind you, it being a rare leap year right now, we don't have too many choices for this feature's usual schtick of Useable Calendars Found in Comic Books. As y'all can see, we haven't used this exact same calendar since 1992. And the last one before that was 1964! Before that was 1936, when the comics industry was still so squeakin' new that Kal-El was still a wee li'l babe ridin' his rocketship through the stars and listening to Jor-El's podcast "Things You Can Do On Earth (That Nobody Else Can Do.)" Sponsored by Casper Mattresses!

Speaking of Casper, one of the few 1964 calendars we can find in comics is in Harvey Comics cover-dated April 1964! So I went down into the Comics Cave, pulled out the longbox that's labelled HARVEY FREAKS OF NATURE, but I sadly seem to be missing Baby Huey, the Baby Giant #57, Sad Sack's Section Eight Comics #20, and For Pete's Sake, Little Lotta, Put Down that Pork Chop Annual #2, so that's not really a helpful solution now, is it? (Except a reminder to recycle more Harvey comics.)

So, as you see, above you'll find the beginning of some calendars from Marvel Age for the also-election year of 1992. Don't get too used to 'em, though, True Bullievers, because the all-cartoon format is about to in a few months and you'll see extremely stream-lined Marvel calendars with less artwork, fewer jokes, and definitely a minimal percentage of Irving Forbush. So enjoy these while they last, and now that they're half-price in the stores, you might want to keep and eye open for the eight-days-a-week stuffed-with-cold-hard-moolah calendar that Richie Rich, one of the aforementioned Harvey Freaks of Nature, seems to be enjoying right here. WHY DON'T YOU GET LOST ALREADY RICH YOU CONSPICUOUS CONSUMPTION 1%ER WHO WILL BE THE FIRST UP AGAINST THE WALL WHEN THE COMICS REVOLUTION COMES!!!

Cover of Ri¢hie Ri¢h DigeSt Winner$ #15 (July 1982), art by some Richie Rich artist guy, I dunno, s'posed to be good for ya

Bully Eats Food: Home-cooked New Year's Day breakfast

Hopefully this egg 'n' Spam sammich will reduce my hangover.

Does anybody really know what year it is?

Panels from Machine Man (1984 miniseries) #1 (October 1984); script by Tom DeFalco; breakdowns by Herb Trimpe; finishes, inks, and colors by Barry Windsor-Smith; letters by Michael Higgins

Tuesday, December 31, 2019

Today in Comics History, December 31, 1999, 11:51 PM, New Year's Eve: Y2K was caused by Two-Face!

from "Apocalypse Girl" in The Batman Chronicles #21 (DC, Summer 2000); script, pencils, and inks by The Pander Brothers; colors by Lee Loughridge; letters by Ken Lopez

Are you ready for the high fashions of 2020?

Panels from Death's Head II #2 (January 1993), script by Dan Abnett, pencils by Liam Sharp, inks by Cam Smith, colors by Helen Stone, letters by Peri Godbold

Today in Comics History, December 31, 1928, New Year's Eve: Well, at least somebody's ready to revel in everything that 1929 will give him from January 1 through October 28th

from Doomsday Clock #10 (DC, July 2019), script by Geoff Johns, pencils and inks by Gary Frank, colors by Brad Anderson, letters by Rob Leigh

Uh oh

Panel from Batman (2016 series) #85 (Late February 2020), script by James Tynion IV, pencils and inks by Guillem March, colors by Tomeu Morey, letters by Clayton Cowles

Stay tuned...

Monday, December 30, 2019

Today in Comics History, December 30, 1999: The moon evolves mechanical tentacles, but it's far from the weirdest thing Warren Ellis writes today

from The Authority (1999 series) #10 (WildStorm, February 2000), script by Warren Ellis, pencils by Bryan Hitch, inks by Paul Neary, colors by Laura Depuy, letters by Ryan Cline