Saturday, February 03, 2007

Separated at Birth: We're Knights of the Round Table

All Star #3 & Legionnaires #54

L: All Star Comics #3, Winter 1940-1941, art by Everett Hibbard
R: Legionnaires #54, November 1997, art by Jeffrey Moy, W. C. Carani, and Patrick Martin
(Click picture to embiggen)

See also.

Friday, February 02, 2007

The Multiple Crimes of Henry Mitchell

I'm beginning to think it's not Dennis who's the menace of the Mitchell family...

Child abuse:

Reckless driving; family endangerment:

Trespassing; theft; corrupting a minor:

Child abuse:

Publicly lusting after women...:

...even in front of his wife:

Child abuse:

Convicted criminal:

Just all-around bat-crap crazy:

Is it any wonder the neighborhood kids are
scared spitless when he wants to "play"?:

Like father, like son. Think about it, won't you?

(Special bonus bat-crap crazy Alice Mitchell panel:)

All panels are taken from various stories in Dennis the Menace "Pocket Full of Fun!" comics digests #2, 3, 8 and 13 (1969 and 1970)

Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Goin' Bananas on National Gorilla Suit Day

National Gorilla Suit Day banner

It's me, Bully, in my National Gorilla Day Suit suit!Hi hi hi everyone! It's me, Bully! No, it really it is me: I'm in my gorilla suit! That's because it's the most wonderful day of the year: National Gorilla Suit Day! I certainly hope you are wearing your gorilla suit today too. I could hardly sleep last night: I laid out my suit before I went to bed and I kept getting up to look at it all through the night! (But you're not allowed to put it on until morning). And you do have to go to sleep! While you are sleeping, The Great Ape swings in through your window, helps himself to the coconuts you have left out, goes through your fridge and makes himself a banana daquiri, and then blesses your gorilla suit with a loving "ook ook" before he swings on down the street! So you can only imagine my thrills when I woke up and found banana peels on the kitchen floor and the blender had been used! Hooray! I climbed right into my suit—I only need a little help zipping it up the back—and set about having an fun-filled day of the most exciting National Gorilla Suit Day activities:

You can read all about this day on Mister Evanier's website.
First, I sat and read the full history of National Gorilla Suit Day on Mister Evanier's website. Remember that National Gorilla Suit Day is not just about the bananas and the's a day to honor MAD's maddest artist, Don Martin! We in ape costumes salute you, Don!

Traditional NGSD snacks.
A little traditional NGSD snack is always appropriate. Also, yummy!

It's a fine day to watch my favorite TV cartoon...
Hooray! Cartoons! This one's fun any day but especially significant today!

...and classic movies!
A classic movie is appropriate viewing today too. Make sure you cheer for the right character! Knock those planes down, King!

Today's special guest stars: Gorillaz!
Speaking of gorillas: those of you who were following my London blog know that I was obsessed with getting those wonderful vinyl figures of the band Gorillaz. I didn't buy them over in the UK but much to my surprise they were available over here, so they were my special National Gorilla Suit Day present! Hooray! Set 'em out, put on your G-Sides CD, and it's just like being in a Jamie Hewlett cartoon! Except Tank Girl is nowhere to be found. Darn.

Golly, Miss Noodle, you're cute.
My gorilla suit was getting a bit hot and whiffy, so in the evening I took it off to play with my new action figures. I know that shocks some of you. "Keep them in the box, Bully!" you scold. "If you take them out and play with them you'll ruin their resale value! How will you even sell them in eBay later?" To which I say to you: "Pfui!" Toys were made to be played with. If you don't take 'em out of the box and set 'em up and move 'em around and make them clash in Infinite Crises of Ultimate Secret Wars, what good are they? If you keep your toys in the cases and never take them out, you may as well just lock them away in a steel vault. I bet you seal your comics in those cheesy CGC plastic cases without even readin' 'em! People like that have no idea how to have fun.

Gorillaz even let me sit in and play a session with them!
F'r instance, why not join your favorite cartoon band in an impromptu jam session? Here I am plunking along with Gorillaz. Miss Noodle said I was a very good banjo plucker. Mister Murdoc said I was some other kind of plucker, I think.

Now it's time for a megaconcert for the City of London!
Now it is time for a megaconcert for the City of London! Everybody sing along! "Don't get lost in heaven/They got locks on the gate."

Suddenly, the wicked Kitten Kong crashes the concert!
Suddenly, giant mutant Kitten Kong crashes the concert!

Londoners flee in terror as the giant kitten stomps through the city!
Londoners flee in terror as the giant kitten stampedes through the panicked city, knocking over the Post Office Tower and toppling the Swiss Re Building! (Well, every cloud has a silver lining, I guess.)

Even the awesome power of music won't stop her rampage!
Music may have charms to sooth a feline beast, but even the awesome power of Gorillaz rock can not stop her rampage!

Who can stop the terrifying giant kitten? Who?
Who can stop the terrifying giant kitten? Who can stop the terrible rampage? Who? Who? Teeny-tiny Harriet Jones, Prime Minister, puts out the call for help!

The Doctor and Rose arrive to save the day!
Ka-chung...ka-chung...ka-chung... Hooray! The Doctor and Rose arrive to save the city and drive off the giant mutant kitten! Hoorah!

The Doctor puts things back almost good as new!
Using the awesome power of time, The Doctor puts London back almost as good as new!

"I'm not the tin dog!"
"I'm not the tin dog!" protests 2D.

Now it is time for a fabulous jam concert. Everybody sing!
Now it is time for a fabulous jam concert to celebrate. Everybody sing!

But Kitten Kong plots revenge!
But Kitten Kong plots her revenge! The End...?

So, as you can see, it was quite the best National Gorilla Suit Day of them all. Hope you had a action-and-fun-packed one as well!