Today in Halloween Comics History, October 31: Well, I'm not sleeping soundly with lettering like that

from Superman/Batman (2003 series) #65 (DC, December 2009); script by Peter Johnson and Matt Cherniss; pencils and inks by Brian Stelfreeze, Brian Haberlin, Kelley Jones, Joe Quinones, and Federico Dallocchio; colors by David Baron and Joe Quinones; letters by Rob Leigh

There Is No Hope in Crime Alley, Night 23: Must There Be a Batman?

Cover of Superman/Batman #17 (March 2005), pencils by Carlos Pacheco, inks by Jesus Merino, colors by Laura Martin
You may remember that yesterday, or only one issue ago in comic book time, Batman shot Joe Chill and thus erased his own batariffic future. That is how time travel works, and I'm standing by that. Anyway, Superman travels forward in time to fetch the now-nothin'-but-a-playboy Bruce Wayne (he still lives with his parents, ha!) and brings him back to the Crime Alley, shouting incoherently that his kids grew up to be a-holes and that where they were going they didn't need roads.


Panels from Superman/Batman #17 (March 2005), script by Jeph Loeb, pencils by Carlos Pacheco, inks by Jesus Merino, colors by Laura Martin and Larry Molinar, letters by Richard Starkings
You know, in a world where Thomas and Martha Wayne survived Park Avenue was not the scene of the murder of two of Gotham City's leading lights, maybe they would have supported live theater city rehabilitation enough that it never would become Crime Alley. But maybe even in a world without a Batman, some things are absolutely unavoidable. Like Bruce's double past, as far as Superman is concerned. Geez, Supes, why doncha just fly him into the world where you're both Nazis oh wait you'd only just averted that one a couple issues ago


Hooray! He snaps Bruce back to his real self which makes absolutely no sense in this timeline because there was never ever a Batman at all but hey, for the sense of the story let's roll with it.


For there to be a Batman, the Waynes must die. It's the universal rule of the DC Universe. And don't feel so alone, Bruce: there's a guy just one universe over on the newsstand named Peter Parker who knows just how you feel.

There Is No Hope in Crime Alley, Night 22: Why don't you just f-f-f-fade away

As I promised yesterday, tonight we see just another one of the many, many deaths of Thomas and Martha Wayne that populate comics history (and this feature)...with a slight difference.


Panels from Superman/Batman #16 (Late February 2005), script by Jeph Loeb, pencils by Carlos Pacheco, inks by Jesus Merino, colors by Laura Martin, letters by Richard Starkings
Okay, here's the short explanation to this scene: Superman and Batman were corrupted by a time-travelling Lightning Lord, Saturn Queen and...Magnet Man? Cosmic Consumer? Captain Attraction?...anyway, three time traveling adult villains of the super-teens from 3005, the Legion of Super-Heroes! Then the all-new, all-different Sinisterman and Badman took over the world! Now Clark and Bruce have come to their super-senses and are hunting Cosmic King (oh, yeah, that was his name) to stop him after or before he time-travels, and of course they've popped into the most invonvenient place and time in the entire multiverse, allowing Batman to observe the death of his parents. Talk about noit being able to go home again, huh? Take that, Thomas Wolfe!


So take a moment to contemplate: what happens when Batman prevents Joe Chill from killing Thomas and Martha Wayne? Well, obviously, the Waynes, including Bruce, live! Y&ay! That's a win. But what happens to Batman himself? Think about it, won't you?


No death of the Waynes, no Batman. DC Comics will surely go bankrupt in this timeline! But stay tuned tomorrow to see how Superman personally kills young Bruce to make certain the entire future of the DC Universe timeline is restored!

(No, he doesn't do that.)

There Is No Hope in Crime Alley, Night 21: Bruce had fun, and it hurt

Yeah, yeah, I know: we've seen it one bajillion times before:


Panels from Superman/Batman #14 (January 2005), script by Jeph Loeb, pencils by Carlos Pacheco, inks by Jesus Merino, colors by Laura Martin, letters by Richard Starkings
But what if just imagine...something different happening that night! What could happen differently, you ask? Surely the death of Batman's parents is a universal constant? Well, tune in tomorrow to see just how correct you are! Answer: not very! Bwah-ha-ha-ha-ha!

365 Days of Defiance, Day 96: You can tell it's an evil universe because Diana's costume is black, shiny, and skintight

So, here's Diana, Princess of the Amazons, searching for a powerful ally on an Earth where Evil Superman and Criminal Batman have taken over the world! (Ooooooh!)


Panels from Superman/Batman #14 (January 2005), script by Jeph Loeb, pencils by Carlos Pacheco, inks by Jesus Merino, colors by Laura Martin, letters by Richard Starkings
She needs a powerful to battle Sinister Superman and Bad Batman. So who does she pick? Green Lantern? Aquaman? Scribby? Captain Morgan?


Nope. Uncle Sam. To be fair to Diana, Green Lantern, Aquaman, Flash and all the rest have been killed, so she couldn't go for them. But Diana: Detective Chimp!

Comics Within Comics Month, Day 27: Comics are your best nutritional value

Panels from Superman/Batman Annual #1 (December 2006)



Cover of Superman (1939 series) #76 (May-June 1952), pencils and inks by Win Mortimer
Hey, look, you can tell the cover image they used in Superman/Batman Annual #1 came from the Grand Comics Database, because the imperfections and the markings on it match!

366 Days with Alfred Pennyworth, Day 234

Panel from Superman/Batman #65 (December 2009), credits...oh, I have no idea

366 Days with Alfred Pennyworth, Day 91

Panel from Superman/Batman #37 (Late August 2007), script by Alan Burnett, pencils by Dustin Nguyen, inks by Derek Fridolfs, colors by Randy Mayor, letters by Rob Leigh


4,400.

Darkseid Does Some Dumb Stuff

Sure, he's noble and regal and dangerous and deadly. But sometimes Darkseid does some dumb stuff. (Hence, the title of the post.)

Darkseid trips and falls flat on his face!

Panels from Superman/Batman #38 (September 2007), script by Alan Burnett, pencils by Dustin Nguyen, inks by Derek Fridolfs, colors by Randy Mayor, letters by Rob Leigh

Darkseid drinks needlessly expensive designer coffee!

Panels from Sovereign Seven #1 (July 1995), script by Chris Claremont, pencils and inks by Dwayne Turner, colors by Gloria Vasquez, separations by Olyoptics, letters by Tom Orzechowski

Darkseid Breaks and Enters!

Panels from Action Comics #593 (October 1987), script, pencils, and figure inks by John Byrne, background inks by Keith Williams, colors by Tom Ziuko, letters by John Costanza

Darkseid doesn't have an escape plan!

Panels from JLA: Another Nail #1 (May 2004), script and pencils by Alan Davis, inks by Mark Farmer, colors by John Kalisz, letters by Patricia Prentice

Darkseid breaks into a secondhand clothing shop!

Page from Super Powers v.3 #3 (November 1986), script by Paul Kupperberg, pencils by Carmine Infantino, inks by Pablo Marcos, colors by Joe Orlando, letters by Albert DeGuzman

...and then he gets mugged!

Not to mention all of these.

Panels from Ambush Bug #1-4 (June-September 1985), plot and pencils by Keith Giffen, script by Robert Fleming, inks by Bob Oksner, colors by Tony Tollin, letters by John Costanza

Yes, occasionally...Darkseid Does Some Dumb Stuff.

Caption from Superman/Batman Annual #1 (December 2006), script by Joe Kelly, colors by Guy Major, letters by Rob Leigh.

Today in Comics History: At Last Pi Day Has Come!

Panel from Superman & Batman: Generations II #4 (November 2001), script, pencils, inks, and letters by John Byrne; colors by Trish Mulvihill

366 Days with Alfred Pennyworth, Day 8

Panel from Superman/Batman #63 (October 2009), co-plot by Michael Green, co-plot and dialogue by Michael Johnson, pencils and inks by Rafael Albuquerque, colors by David Baron, letters by Rob Leigh

Today in Comics History, October 31: Never let the Grandson of the Demon pick out your Halloween costume

Supergirl and Damian Wayne go trick or treating!


from Superman/Batman (2003 series) #77 (DC, December 2010), script by Joshua Williamson, pencils by Ale Garza, inks by Oliver Nome, colors by Pete Pantazis, letters by Steve Wands