There Is No Hope in Crime Alley, Night 23: Must There Be a Batman?

Cover of Superman/Batman #17 (March 2005), pencils by Carlos Pacheco, inks by Jesus Merino, colors by Laura Martin
You may remember that yesterday, or only one issue ago in comic book time, Batman shot Joe Chill and thus erased his own batariffic future. That is how time travel works, and I'm standing by that. Anyway, Superman travels forward in time to fetch the now-nothin'-but-a-playboy Bruce Wayne (he still lives with his parents, ha!) and brings him back to the Crime Alley, shouting incoherently that his kids grew up to be a-holes and that where they were going they didn't need roads.


Panels from Superman/Batman #17 (March 2005), script by Jeph Loeb, pencils by Carlos Pacheco, inks by Jesus Merino, colors by Laura Martin and Larry Molinar, letters by Richard Starkings
You know, in a world where Thomas and Martha Wayne survived Park Avenue was not the scene of the murder of two of Gotham City's leading lights, maybe they would have supported live theater city rehabilitation enough that it never would become Crime Alley. But maybe even in a world without a Batman, some things are absolutely unavoidable. Like Bruce's double past, as far as Superman is concerned. Geez, Supes, why doncha just fly him into the world where you're both Nazis oh wait you'd only just averted that one a couple issues ago


Hooray! He snaps Bruce back to his real self which makes absolutely no sense in this timeline because there was never ever a Batman at all but hey, for the sense of the story let's roll with it.


For there to be a Batman, the Waynes must die. It's the universal rule of the DC Universe. And don't feel so alone, Bruce: there's a guy just one universe over on the newsstand named Peter Parker who knows just how you feel.