Hey, Remember When That Happened?: 2013

Hey, remember that time in 2013 when civilization had fallen, New York City had been nearly razed, and mutants were either exterminated or incarcerated in concentration camps?


Panels from [Uncanny] X-Men (1963 series) #141 (January 1981), co-plot and script by Chris Claremont, co-plot and pencils by John Byrne, inks by Terry Austin, colors by Glynis Wein, letters by Tom Orzechowski
You don't? Hmmm, me either. Well, year's not done yet. I imagine all the X-Men comic book will be canceled when that happens, though, so hang onto your collection for speculator purposes. Remember, according to some of the biggest mouths on the internet, everything increases in value when someone connected to it dies!




Panels from Uncanny X-Men (1963 series) #142 (February 1981), co-plot and script by Chris Claremont, co-plot and pencils by John Byrne, inks by Terry Austin, colors by Glynis Wein, letters by Tom Orzechowski
And nobody ever saw the X-Men, ever again.

I have found the very first DC/Marvel crossover!

Hey, remember that time when the Sub-Mariner appeared in a DC/National book by kind permission of Timely Comics? When Batman and Robin teamed up with Prince Namor?


Panels from "The Mystery of the Winged People!" in Batman #61 (October-November 1950), script by Bill Finger, pencils by Dick Sprang, inks by Charles Paris, letters by Ira Schnapp
Naw, me neither. But we can dream, can't we?

Watch, man

Hey, remember back in 1983 when this happened?


Panel from "Worlds at War!" in Journey into Mystery v.1 #50 (January 1959), pencils and inks by Jack Davis; recolored version published in Curse of the Weird #4 (March 1994), new colors by Ashley Posella

Naw, me either.

But I do remember this happening in 1985:



Panels from Watchmen #12 (October 1987), script by Alan Moore; pencils, inks, and letters by Dave Gibbons; colors by John Higgins
When did he do it, you might ask?


Be that as it may, here's what else happened in 1983, while you were all drinking your new-fangled "juice boxes" (those things'll never last!) and hanging up "Baby on Board" signs on your car, or, if you didn't have a car, just right on your baby. Yes, 1983 was the year J'onn J'onnz cosplayers came to Earth! (They shoulda took that left turn at Albuquerque.)


Well, the Martians are an evolved and advanced race. Surely they'll be willing to teach us their methods of global peace and harmony and...hey! Where ya goin'?


You know, I gotta wonder about these aliens that give us so much advance warning before destroying us. What's in it for them? I mean, lookit the Xindi. They destroyed Florida twenty-six episodes before they were ready to blow up the Earth. Did that make any sense? Well, no more than having a beagle in space. Speaking of beagles in space, the world's nations decide to get together and launch a dog into space band together to become stronger for the sake of humanity! It's just like President Benjamin Franklin said: "We must, indeed, all hang together, or assuredly we shall all hang separately. Now, pass me that tankard of ale, wench, for 'tis truly partying time! Yeee-haw!"


And faster than you can set a montage to the tune of hit single "Flashdance...What a Feeling," one of the biggest songs of 1983, everybody teams up with each other and gets things done! Yes, Americans and Russians working together...it's just like the movie Armageddon! It's partnership and brotherhood, hand in hand, just like the hit "Ebony and Ivory," which was released in 1982 but was still a big hit in 1983. Also, popular 1983 comedian Yakov Smirnoff helped. "In Soviet Union, rocket fires us!"


Surprise! It was all a prank that the Martians were put up to by their goofy cousins on Jupiter. Also, it was a way to get the Americans and Russians to be stronger together! World peace has been achieved thanks to the threat of mutual destruction! That old trick? It worked all along!


And it all happened in 1983...two years before the events of Alan Moore's Watchmen. Then, it was beamed back in time, past Thor's nose, to be published in a 1959 issue of Journey into Mystery. Just so Stan Lee could say

"I did it twenty-four years ago!

Ah, those wacky comic book writers. Always usin' time travel to get one up on the other.

Hey, Remember When That Happened?: 1963

Greetings, history-peepers! (With a special hello to you, Uatu!) On tonight's edition of Hey, Remember When That Happened?, let's travel back in time to the tumultuous year of 1963!

Astro Boy premieres in the US!

The Beatles' first album is released!

The first James Bond film debuts!

President Kennedy is assassinated!

Also, the world ended!

Panels from "The War That Never Happened!" in Wonder Woman #60 (July-August 1953), script by Robert Kanigher, pencils and inks by Harry G. Peter

Yeah...remember when that happened? Yeah, me either.




That's because it never happened. Yes! It never happened...thanks to...Happy Fun Ball!





And now you know why...you don't remember...when that happened!


Panel section from Fantastic Four #543 (April 2007), script by Dwayne McDuffie, pencils by Mike McKone, inks by Andy Lanning and Cam Smith, colors by Paul Mounts, letters by Rus Wooton