Bully Says: Comics Oughta Be Fun!

Wednesday, February 06, 2019

A Grand Day Out: Bully goes to IKEA

Thank goodness my world navigation map worked and I was able to row my little coracle to Sweden!

"Hej" is how you say "hello" in Sweden. Hej, IKEA!

Hej!

First, you should have an inexpensive Swedish meal to get the energy you need to go shopping!

Meals for CHILDREN? Not with all thsoe vegetables!

I am tempted to fill up on delicious desserts. Hej, desserts!

Just shove 'em directly into my pants and I'll eat 'em later.

Dunno why they bothered cuttin' it up into pieces, but sure, I'll have that pie.

This is almost better than Grammy Bull's oven!

I got some delicious chicken fingers. Like all things in IKEA, you assemble them yourself. From a flat-packed chicken.

Hope that chicken wasn't still usin' em.

Hope that chicken wasn't still usin' em.

Always clean up after yourself. Or they won't let you in next time!

I've heard they send bounty hunters after you or somethin'.

IT WAS EXCELLENT THANK YOU.

If only the questions on my doctorate were this easy!

Video Interlude: Riding up the escalator at IKEA is fun, especially the diegetic shopping music! Sing along like I did!

Oh boy! Småland the Magic Forest and Swedish Ball Pit! I wanna go in there. Yes, I am toilet trained!

I can't wait to ride on Shelf World (left)!

I can't wait to ride on Shelf World (left)!

Aw man, their height restrictions are just too harsh.

'But I've been eating Wonder Bread! To grow on!'

Anyway, the first thing you gotta do at IKEA is stock up on little pencils. Don't be caught out without them! There may be a test!

I kinda annoyed them by dumpin' 'em all out on the floor and making certain they were all number 2s.

I kinda annoyed them by dumpin' 'em all out on the floor and making certain they were all number 2s.

These selections of fine china and fancy glassware are just my size!

The only bad thing about these cups is you gotta pimp 'em yourself.

HEY MOM! LOOK WHAT I AM AND IN WHAT KIND OF SHOP!

This place is sheer pandemonium! Get it? Pandamonium? Tee hee hee hee...oh, you're no fun anymore.

Thie is definitely one of thsoe black-and-white problems.

Thie is definitely one of thsoe black-and-white problems.

My pal BLÅHAJ invited me in for a bite.

🎶 Oh that shark bites, with his teeth dear, and he keeps them, pearly white, yeah! 🎶

Happy Lunar New Year from the Discount Bin o' Pigs!

They invited me to STY, but...

I am too big to sleep in a crib. Altho' I don't mind the bottle service.

WAAAAH I need my diaper changed! Ah, I'm just kidding/. As indicated previously, I AM toilet-trained. Actually, I do wish one of the IKEA people would point me to the bathroom.

WAAAAH I need my diaper changed! Ah, I'm just kidding/. As indicated previously, I AM toilet-trained. Actually, I do wish one of the IKEA people would point me to the bathroom.

IKEA is a big store and it helps if you can find a faster way to get around.

Why aren't I moving? Oh, it's bolted down.

IKEA: we put the fun in funnel!

Yes, I came out all the way to IKEA just to make THAT JOKE.

HOW DID I GET STUCK IN HERE?!?

I am not a Crisp Pig! I am a very Soft Bull.

It wasn't me who tracked all over the rug! So stop staring at me, Dilbert!

Your creator is already crazy, Dilbert, but I bet within the next two years he totally destroys his own comic strip!

Your creator is already crazy, Dilbert, but I bet within the next two years he totally destroys his own comic strip!

These sheepskin rugs are like lying on a giant mountain of whipped potatoes.

No, seriously, I REALLY need a bathroomn.

I just got an amazing idea!

'Ping!'

Floatin' up on a lighter than air balloon!

Really, it was worth it all just for the two definitions of the word 'light.'

I need these moving spotlights for when I hold film premieres at Twentieth Century Bull.

Or, an MTV World Premiere Video starring Jane Wiedlin.

SERIOUSLY HOW DID I GET STUCK IN HERE?!?

BEWARE MY LANTERN

And the moral of the story: bulls who live in glass houses shouldn't change their clothes in front of everybody.

So THIS is what they meant when they named that Australian band.

So THIS is what they meant when they named that Australian band.

Whew! I'm all tuckered out from walkin' all around IKEA! Luckily they have free beds available for naps.

zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

I wonder if they have any flat-pack furniture here...oh, hey!

Plenty of big savings here at Warehosue of Pressboard!

"I am looking to find the IKEA cinnamon rolls, please!"

Curiously enough, it didn't lead me to where I wanted, but to where I was needed.

SUCCESS! CINNAMON BUN ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED.

WE EAT TONIGHT!

Portrait of a bull in front of lingonberries.

And now, reporting from the field, Bully for 'Storage Jars'.'

My favorite Swedish food and my favorite Bill Murray movie, now together in one frozen package.

These will also be useful when I have a headache.

ŠWĒDÏŠH PÅMČÅKËS!

Yὖm!

I have found my favorite part of the store: pick and mix Swedish Candy! You go on without me for a minute; I'll be rummaging around head first in this thing if'n ya need me.

5: Gorge

If it's outside the cup it's free! Them's the rules! nom nom nom nom

"!Ⴑǝʜ" is how you say goodbye in Swedish! !Ⴑǝʜ, IKEA! !Ⴑǝʜ!

Or, I may have made another one of my silly misteaks.

You were enjoyed, IKEA. See ya later, ya crazy big blue 'n' yellow nut, you!

Oh! I forgot to ask them if it was a coincidence that they were painted in the official colors of Sweden.