Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Correcting Esquire...again.

So, I was readin' the latest issue of Esquire ("The magazine for sophisticated little stuffed bulls") and came across this chart that purports to "Rate the Star Trek Hotties":

Women of Trek


Huh. Me, I think they forgot somebody. As you know, yours little stuffed truly never shys away from correcting Esquire magazine, so in the spirit of restoring the icon they've criminally overlooked, I whipped up this revised version:

Women of Trek

There. That's better. The original and still the finest, in both definitions of the word.


9 comments:

Siskoid said...

Definitely! Uhura and her rock solid abs are the hottest of all.

I'm pretty sure there are a couple of ladies who should have been considered for TNG representatives before Guinan too.

(And Terry Farrell? For shame. Kira all the way.)

(And T'Pol? Go Hoshi!!!)

Novice said...

They're going to get letters about that one! Guys our age are still in love with Nichelle Nichols, and she's a granny now!

S Bates said...

What about Janeway? Or Nurse Chapel? Or Deanna Troi? Or Major Kira? Or... well, I could go on but I won't.

Michael Jones said...

T'Pring! Ezri Dax! M'ress! the list goes on and on. But Uhura tops them all!

Anonymous said...

Yeah, where the spotted heck IS Hoshi? Oh, of course. She's so hot she's off the bloody chart!

Blaylock and Ryan my left...Sorry, I should watch my language around little stuffed bulls. I just never found them all that attractive.

They're right about Goldberg, though. {runs away}

Brian Smith said...

The problem with all of our corrections is that they disprove Esquire's thesis, which is "Star Trek women have been getting progressively more appealing, culminating in Zoe Saldana." Remember, if the facts don't support the conclusion, then the facts need to be discarded! So here's how Esquire must have disqualified some of the people who would disprove their theory:

Nichelle Nichols: Better known for her work on "Futurama."
Julie Newmar: Better known for "Batman."
Sherry "What Are Little Girls Made Of?" Jackson: Better known for "Make Room for Daddy."
Gates McFadden: "Mad About You."
Marina Sirtis: "Gargoyles."
Famke Janssen: "X-Men."

I think Maxim magazine used a similar technique when they named Olga Kurylenko "the hottest Bond girl ever."

Adam said...

frankly baylock needs to be at about the same level as whoopi.

She looks like an angry teenaged boy.

But that hoshi lady, damn!

and yup, the original uhura is still the finest of all the star trek ladies. Mostly due to those go go skirts, rawr!

dave™© said...

No Grace Lee Whitney?

Anonymous said...

Clearly these guys never saw the Mirror Universe episodes of Enterprise, cause, damn, was Hoshi hot in those.