G'day, hosers! It's yer favorite ol' Canucklehead Logan here, with s'more fashion do's 'n' don't's straight from the design house of Wolverine. In fact, these fashions are so hot that even Johnny Storm can't wear 'em! Heh heh heh...Johnny Storm...y'see, it's a joke about how he can catch on fire and...oh, forget it, bub. Yer as dull as Chuck Xavier.
Anyway, in these hot hot hot days of summer, even a guy like me who hangs out in yellow spandex knows that less is more. Long sleeves out. Short sleeves: in. Trousers: out. Short shorts: in. Short tempers? Well, ol' Logan wouldn't get far without that. Ruby quartz sunglasses: stone cold. Adamantium claws? Never gone outta style, bub. What about that fashion standby fer millions o' men, the ol' necktie? Well, jus' like Scott Summer's marriage vows, long ties are definitely a thing o' the past. What's hot now, bub, is short ties. Short short short! Can't afford the new short tie fashion? Don't worry yer pretty li'l heads: I'm the best there is at what I do, and what I do is fashionable:
An' the ol' Canucklehead don't only give fashion advice to butch military types. Nope, even ex-fashion models sometimes need my help. Remember, Red: less is more:
Oh yeah. Now that's what the Wolverine is cookin'.
So remember, bubs, stay cool and look cool with Logan's advice: less is more.
Take my fashion advice an' ya won't be able to beat the redheads off'a ya with metal claws!