Avengers: Age of Magnets

If you had asked me before I saw the movie, I would not have guessed that out of all Stan Lee's early-Marvel Age corny goofball gimmicks that could possibly make it into Avengers: Age of Ultron, it would be this one:

CAPTAIN AMERICA'S SHIELD-RETRIEVING GLOVE MAGNETS

Which — it's canon, fanboys! — debuted in Avengers #6. Soon after the publication of this seminal comic book, every kid in the neighborhood was sticking refrigerator magnets to their cuffs and throwing trash can lids around. Cultural response was rapid: every dad in America yelled "Stop throwing trash can lids around!"



Panels from The Avengers (1963 series) #6 (July 1964), script by Stan Lee, pencils by Jack Kirby, inks by Chic Stone, colors by Stan Goldberg, letters by Sam Rosen
Yes, Captain Amagnetica's Merics America's Magnets! Designed to make his shield always return to him in those early days before a Roy Thomas retcon revealed that the shield was actually made of pure boomerang! Yes, magnets, the miracle invention that always work!


Panel from "Captain America" in Tales of Suspense #59 (November 1964), co-plot and script by Stan Lee, co-plot and pencils by Jack Kirby, inks by Chic Stone, letters by Sam Rosen
Yes, as Howard Stark's contemporary Diet Smith was often heard to intone, to anybody who was unlucky enough to get cornered by him at a party: The nation that controls magnetism controls the universe! Voila:


But it took billionaire playboy scientific genius Tony Stark, winner of the George Sanders Slimmest Mustache of 1964 Award, to steal adapt Smith's designs and turn them into a powerful weapon for Cap, which he was not allowed to put anywhere near Tony's collection of Mamas and the Papas 8-track tapes.


Panel from "The Army of Assassins Strikes!" in Tales of Suspense #60 (December 1964), script by Stan Lee, pencils by Jack Kirby, inks by Chic Stone, letters by Artie Simek
And so that, comics history buffs, is why we see Cap use magnets in every single one of his appearances for, um, three months during the sixties, and then not again until today. Because they're goofy.


Panels from "Break-Out in Cell Block 10!" in Tales of Suspense #62 (February 1965), script by Stan Lee, pencils by Jack Kirby, inks by Chic Stone, letters by Artie Simek
Aw, don't pout, Cap! You'll always have a magnetic attraction to me! And Tony Stark continued to sweep the George Sanders Award annual until an upset loss in the early 1980s to John Waters. And now you know...the rest...of the story.

Hey, does this count as KirbyTech? It doesn't? OH FOR PETE'S SAKE.