Today in Halloween Comics History: Mole People are proven to be rock stupid

Panels from "When the Earth Blacked Out!" in Strange Adventures #144 (September 1962), script by John Broome, pencils and inks by Murphy Anderson

Today in Comics History: The Doctor is really crap at Halloween

Panels from "Wholloween" in Doctor Who: The Eleventh Doctor #4 (October 2014), by Marc Ellerby

365 Days of Star Wars Comics, Day 304: You know it's thriller, thriller night

Panels from "Planet of the Dead" in Star Wars Tales #17 (September 2003), script by Steve Niles, pencils by Davide Fabbri, inks by Christian Dalla Vecchia, colors by Sno Cone Studios, letters by Steve Dutro

365 Days of Star Wars Comics, Day 303: No time for Star Wars, Dr. Jones

Panels from "Into the Great Unknown" in Star Wars Tales #19 (March 2004), script by Haden Blackman, pencils and inks by Sean Murphy, colors by Dan Jackson, letters by Steve Dutro

365 Days of Star Wars Comics, Day 302: Worst Dancing with the Stars routine, ever

Page from Star Wars: Dark Times #12 (June 2008), script by Randy Stradley, pencils and inks by Dave Ross, colors by Dave McCaig, letters by Michael Heisler

365 Days of Star Wars Comics, Day 301: Sergio Stomps Star Wars

Panels from Star Wars (2015 Marvel series) #2 (April 2015), pencils and inks by Sergio Aragonés

365 Days of Star Wars Comics, Day 300: We now return to the Republican Presidential Debate

Panel from Star Wars: Legacy (2006 series) #31 (December 2008), co-plot and script by John Ostrander, co-plot and pencils by Jan Duursema, inks by Dan Parsons, colors by Brad Anderson, letters by Michael Heisler

365 Days of Star Wars Comics, Day 299: The Vaders: A Family Portrait

Cover of Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic #25 (January 2008), painting by Travis Charest

365 Days of Star Wars Comics, Day 298: See-Threepio's How to Win Friends and Influence Droids

Panels from Star Wars (Marvel 2015 series) #10 (December 2015), script by Jason Aaron, pencils by Stuart Immonen, inks by Wade von Grawbadger, colors by Justin Ponsor, letters by Chris Eliopoulos

Let's Kill Hitler: Too Many Hitlers

UP AGAINST THE WALL HITLER


Cover of Blackhawks (1957 DC series) #272 (September 1984), script by Mark Evanier, pencils and inks by Dan Spiegle, colors by Jerry Serpe, letters by Carrie McCarthy
For our final Hitler-killing expedition today I've saved the most for last. The most Hitlers, that is! And now, just what you've been waiting for: hot Charles de Gaulle on Adolf Hitler action!


Panels from Blackhawks (1957 DC series) #262 (September 1983), script by Mark Evanier, pencils and inks by Dan Spiegle, colors by Carl Gafford, letters by Carrie McCarthy
I'd like to say that, contrary to international perception of the French, de Gaulle socks Hitler in the jaw harder than Captain America and wins the war single-handedly! But actually, the Blackhawks rush in, push Hitler out of a window...


Then Hitler blows up real good! Whee-oo!


The Blackhawks killed Hitler! The Blackhawks killed Hitler! Or…did they?!?

No. No, they did not. It was a double.


Yep! A handful of issues earlier in the series, we saw the Ubermeister Project. Or, as I like to call it, The Hitler Bunch.


Panels from Blackhawk #256 (March 1983), script by Mark Evanier, pencils and inks by Dan Spiegle, colors by Carl Gafford, letters by Carrie McCarthy
(Which leads to this improbable statement being word-ballooned:)


Oh, did I mention there's an invisible man in this story? There's an invisible man in this story. Who wears glasses.


Anyway, back in Blackhawk #262, all the extra Hitlers have been dispatched to assassinate the leaders of the Allied countries. Here's everybody's World War II pal and Cold War villain, Josef Stalin!


from Blackhawk #262
That one's dead too! Well, what about the Hitler planning to kill FDR by crashing a plane into him? He's trapped when Olaf of the Blackhawks strings up a trip wire. Geez, when did Hitler become Wile E. Coyote?



Even Winston Churchill gets to see one of the exploding Hitlers. What, they just blow ip when you thump 'em on the chest? Talk about having a manufacturing defect.


That's pretty much fake Hitlers all around, then?


So, as we wrap up "Let's Kill Hitler" today, with a big heap of Hitlers piled up in the back yard, please note that none of them are Baby Hitlers.

Let's Kill Hitler: The Final Mission of the Unknown Soldier

Panel from Unknown Soldier #268 (October 1982), script by Bob Haney, pencils by Dick Ayers, inks by Gerry Talaoc, colors by Bob LeRose, letters by John Costanza
It really was his final mission. He dies in the last few pages and his book gets cancelled. For a comic book characters that's double death.

Let's Kill Hitler: Better leave the smashing to Hulk

It's so rare that a comic book cover caption so clearly spells out the exact theme of my post! Admittedly, Spy Smasher is about to shoot Hitler rather than smash Hitler, but we'll let it slide, even though a comic book entitled Hitler Shooter would've sold a bajillion copies in 1943.


Cover of Spy Smasher #10 (January 1943), pencils and inks by Alex Blum (?)
Man, is this guy excited about getting Hitler or what? He's like a kid on Hitler-Getting Eve!


Panels from "Why I Did Not Kill Hitler*" in Spy Smasher #10 (January 1943), pencils and inks by Alex Blum (?).
Apologies for the washed-out scans — they're from online photos of microfiche!
Aw, man, Hitler's just looking out the window to see if his bird feeder needs filling, dude!


It's nice to see a superhero take some pleasure in his work. Not to, say, the point of crazed helplessness that Spy Smasher is, but hey.


So, job satisfaction, World War II over, cigars and brandy all around, huh?


No! It was a just a double that he shot! Hitler's...window-looking double.


How does that make you feel about getting Hitler now, Spy Smasher?


Moral of the story? Stick to smashing.

* I guess the title of the story kinda gave it away anyway.

Let's Kill Hitler: In Which Chris Claremont Writes a Few Thousand Words about How Kitty Pryde Doesn't Kill Hitler

In X-Men: True Friends (an would-be Excalibur graphic novel series that got downgraded to an X-Men comic, Kitty Pryde goes back in time to 1936 with her "true friend" Rachel Summers (take that, Illyana Rasputin!) Also, she hangs around with the future Queen Elizabeth II! Marvel Team-Up!

Also: she vows to kill Hitler.


Panel from X-Men: True Friends #2 (October 1999), script by Chris Claremont, pencils by Rick Leonardi, inks by Al Williamson and Jimmy Palmiotti, colors by Shannon Blanchard, letters by Tom Orzechowski


Panels from X-Men: True Friends #3 (November 1999), script by Chris Claremont, pencils by Rick Leonardi, inks by Al Williamson, colors by Shannon Blanchard, letters by Tom Orzechowski
But, although Kitty talks a lot about killing Hitler, she never actually does.


I'm pretty sure if there's anyone in the Marvel Universe we'd like to be unsullied by killing Hitler, it's Kitty Pryde. And possibly Squirrel Girl.

Let's Kill Hitler: And now, a rebuttal from Mister James Buchanan Barnes

If you can follow all those criss-crossy word balloons, you'll see that Hawkeye Ronin asks the musical question we've been dealing with all day: "if you had a time machine yadda yadda yadda Hitler?"


Panel from Dark Avengers: The List: The Avengers one-shot (November 2009), script by Brian Michael Bendis, pencils by Marko Djurdjevic, inks by Mark Morales, colors by Marte Gracia, letters by Joe Caramagna
So, if we've learned nothing from the past three posts, it's that the Original Human Torch and Toro blasted, their way into Hitler's bunker in April '45, and the Torch and killed Hitler (even though his brain patterns were preserved in a clone body by Arnim Zola). That's a pretty good claim for the Human Torch to being the member of the WWII group the Invaders that killed Hitler. Right? Right, Bucky Barnes formerly of the Invaders, who is now the new Captain America?


Ehhhh…I'm pretty sure you didn't, Bucky.


But I don't blame Bucky. Ya know who I blame? Bendis.